I Am A Dumb Consumer

Consumers, are we slow or just plain n00bs?

I just realized something as I walked by Low Yat Plaza (a popular tech mall in Malaysia) sometime back. I stopped by one of the outlets I shopped at regularly and asked what's up with tech these days. To be honest, I was kind of astounded with the reply, not like kid in a candy store, but rather it was more like a flash bang grenade thrown into my face.

My first question was. "WTB (What the Butt)? Intel has new microprocessor?" Seriously, I was interested. Heck I had been concentrating on my audio and camera setup for the past 6 months and my overclocked AMD Athlon 64 X2 was coping just fine.

Then it dawned upon me, complacency where stuff moves as fast as the Road Runner on USAF GO pills wasn't doing anything good or dandy for my purchasing choices. And I just realized that without knowledge, all my powers of masterful purchasing were gone with the wind. Dammit, I was N00bified!

Ouch, I felt like Superman without his super-strength and super-red underpants, and it dawned on me that I'll just choose like everyone does. Come to think of it, how do people choose products that they have little or no knowledge of, eh?

Interesting, most interesting, I thought to myself. Sometimes, it's nice to think about that.

For starters, this editorial is meant to educate those who do not already know. But let's be honest, most techies enjoy a chuckle or two reading an article some moron wrote about the obvious, eh? Who doesn't like the obvious being plastered on them and giggling when they look back on all the dumb purchases they made in the past?

Heck, it's like a sordid trip down memory lane. I still remember when the only reason I bought a Sound Blaster sound card was because the box said that it had some kind of super chip called the EMU10K1. I was like, HOLY GOD, I HAVE TO BUY THIS!

So, let me chronicle my journey into dumb consumerism and let you get a chuckle or two out of it. Who knows, it might even educate some of you from falling for cheap marketing tactics that many companies use on us. I'll even throw in a moral at the end of it. How about that? I'm surprised no one has made me a saint so far.

Buckle your seat belts, close your eyes, pray to the teapot in the sky, because we're all going for a trip down memory lane, when we were real stupid n00bs.